Saturday, December 06, 2008

Annual Reviews - for Marriages?

Well, it's that time of year for employees at my company and at others across the nation - performance reviews. I have filled out and submitted mine, and I am now eagerly (or not) anticipating feedback from my peers and superiors for my job performance over the last year.

In addition to my review at work, I recently sat down with our roommate to discuss how things are going with her. She's been living with us for over 6 months now, and not only was I interested in her perspective, but I also wanted to mention a few marginal improvements I am hoping she will work on.

Although I have been in positions of leadership before, I had never sat down with someone to give them a "review". I think it went well, but the next day I thought about a new twist on this idea - what if marriages had an annual review? What if we scheduled a recurring date to exchange honest feedback about our performance as spouses?

I think it's a great idea! There are two problems that I can foresee though - 1) Both sides would have to be willing and able to accept criticism, otherwise what's the point really? 2) I can't think of any viable consequences for negative feedback. Firing them isn't an option, nor is not giving them a raise.

What do you think readers (crickets chirping)?


Elly'sMommy said...

Well, I have to comment because I saw on Kate's blog that you "never" get any comments, so you guilted at least one person you don't know into commenting!

Marriage performance reviews sound like a totally scary idea to me... but still good! I think something like that would only work in a Christian, thriving marriage b/c otherwise, well, why bother really? Anyway, I'd think that if you truly love your spouse and you want to hear their criticism b/c you desire to change for their better, then consequences won't be an issue. God can be trusted to convict, discipline, reward, etc as needed.

There's my comment. Good luck on collecting others!

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