How Bad do you Want It?

My friend/co-worker/workout partner Chris said this phrase to me once - "It all depends on how badly you want it".  I don't even remember what we were talking about - probably about making time to go to the gym, which him and I typically do several mornings per week.  I can't recall for certain though.

I've been thinking about that phrase a lot lately though.  Amanda and I are planning on taking a cruise some time this summer, and if I'm going to be in a bathing suit a lot, then I would love to feel and look really fit.  Granted, my abs haven't completely disappeared (I'm still in pretty good shape), but they're not cut like they used to be either.

At my age though, how difficult would it be to get rid of that extra few pounds/layers that are hiding my stomach muscles?  I recently read (is it really reading though if you're mainly looking at pictures?) a post on The Chive called "Actors Who Went Overboard".  One of the more dramatic examples is picture #10, of Christian Bale (see below).

The caption below the picture reads:

Christian Bale lived on an apple a day to prepare for his “svelte” role in The Machinist and then put on 100 pounds of muscle to play Bruce Wayne in Batman Begins

I couldn't help but think - how badly must you "want it" to live on an apple a day?  How badly then do I "want it" if I can't forgo the garlic bread that accompanies the pasta-laden soup for dinner?  Or what about that piece of cake?  How badly do I really want those abs - enough to skip dessert?

That's the big question about any other goal too - how badly do I want that degree, that raise, to play that instrument, to learn another language, to grow closer to God, etc.

I know that being goal driven isn't the only thing in life, and sometimes it can be more harmful than beneficial (if you"want it", whatever the goal is, so badly that you're sacrificing the relationships with your loved ones, for example).  But if you find yourself falling short of whatever goals you are hoping to accomplish, then try asking yourself that question the next time you face an obstacle or stumbling block:

"How bad do you want it?"

The Joys of the Gym

One of the many things I enjoy about working for GE is the benefit of their nearby gym.  At $15/month, the facility and equipment aren't anywhere near as impressive as Gold's or LA Fitness, but they have all the equipment I need, they're rarely crowded in the mornings (I try to get there around 6:30am), and the building is less than a mile from my desk.

Like any gym, there is a wide variety of people you’ll see there, but lately I've been finding myself observing the oddities of humanity more than usual.  This provide a mixture of amusement, amazement, annoyance, and sometimes disgust.  Some examples of the things I've seen recently are:

• I typically go to the same locker area, mostly out of habit.  But if my usual area of the locker room happens to be crowded, or even if there are just one or two guys in the vicinity, I’ll shift to a different one.  Most of the lockers are empty in the morning anyway, so there are hundreds of options to choose from.  Similar to the shower though, it still surprises me when a man walks in a virtually empty and spacious locker room, then just has to go to his usual locker, which is right next to or just across from mine.
  
• My work out partner actually found toe nail clippings on the floor in front of the lockers.  What kind of man would think that this is acceptable behavior?  If I were to see someone in the act of doing this, I would have a really hard time not saying something to him.
  
• Sure, aftershaves and/or body sprays often provide decent aromas, but when the entire locker room is gagging from the overpowering stench, how can you not tell that you've used too much?  I mean, how can someone’s sense of smell be that bad, that they would need to use an entire bottle in order to tell that it’s enough for one day?  I feel bad for anyone who is working next to him, or even in the same building.

After using the gym in the morning, I always take a shower before heading to work.  That’s provided some interesting fodder as well, including:

• There are 18 separate enclosed shower stalls (w/a curtain as the door).  Since a lot fewer people go to the gym in the morning than any other time of day, there aren't too many stalls being occupied when I shower (2-3 at a time maybe).  Why then, when I’m taking a shower, must a man pick the stall directly next to mine?  This may sound a little extreme, but it kinda grosses me out to know that some guy’s shower water could be running down his naked body then splashing on me from under the gap at the bottom of the partition.  If enough shower stalls are available, then can’t you just leave a gap between us?
  
• I have seasonal allergies (for a week or two each in the fall and spring), so I know how it can be when your nose and/or lungs are struggling with the blockage that sometimes accompanies these times of year.  I also know how working out can help clear some of this blockage (force the cardiovascular system to expand and open up).  But do you have to spit your cleared blockages on the shower floor?
  
• My co-worker/workout partner Chris noticed some of the shower stalls have boogers smeared on the walls.
  
• I once found a used band-aid in the shower’s soap dish.  Luckily I didn't see any blood or puss on it, but even still…
  
• There is an odd looking man with very fair skin and gray hair.  He’s tall and slightly overweight, (but not obese).  He has a nasally voice and does not look like he has a single hair on his face or his entire body.  How do I know this?  Because he often stands in the locker room air drying for an extended period of time.  Sometimes he shakes his hips with his towel waving in the air behind him, like he’s trying to dry his backside.  But he’s not really trying to dry off – it’s just a sickening show.  I thought to myself “am I being too judgmental?”  But I asked my workout partner about it, and he laughed and exclaimed “Yeah, of course I noticed, and I hate that!”
  
  A few weeks ago when I got out of the shower he was doing his usual thing in the locker room aisle, but this time he was standing on one foot and had the other one propped up on the front of a standing fan, so that the fan can blow on his little pink, bald junk.  I couldn't take it anymore and said “Come on!  Really?!”  He looked over at me.  “Do you really have to prop your foot up and dry your balls off in front of everyone?”  He stepped down and responded guiltily “I’m um, drying my toes.  Have you ever had athletes foot?”  “Yeah, I have.”  I replied, calling his bluff.
  
  I didn't see him in the locker room for a number of weeks after that.  I wasn't trying to be a bully, but blatantly airing your manhood for way more time than necessary is just gross and inconsiderate of everyone else around you.

Weekend Update for Sept 19-21

I know very few people would care to read the following long post about my weekend escapades, but I still want to blog about it anyway, just for the sake of posterity.

FRIDAY NIGHT
Friday night I had just gotten home from a bonzai trip to Ft. Wayne Indiana.  I had driven up on Thursday evening, visited our supplier on Friday, the driven back Friday night.  I have no idea what Amanda and I did that evening and neither does she. It's not too surprising for me to forget, but it's unusual for both of us to have no recollection.  We might have watched a South Park episode.  Before bed though I got to play the tooth fairy for Emily, who lost one of her front teeth that day.

LITTLE GREY MOUSE?

Saturday morning I got a couple things done around the house before Lucas' soccer game.  Just before we were ready to leave for the game, the kids and I were waiting in the car for Amanda to come out of the house.  Then Emily yelled "look, a little grey mouse!".  I thought she might have seen it scuttle somewhere, never to be seen again, but she could still see it so we all got out of the car to have a look.  Sure enough, there it was roaming around in the mulch area near out garage door.  Then I realized and proclaimed "That's not a mouse, it's a mole!" We have been encountering a few piles of dirt in our yard and we had suspected it was due to moles.  When it ran onto the cement and started heading toward the opened garage door I instinctively stepped on it.  I had only meant to trap it though, until I could figure out what to do with it, but when I lifted my foot it looked like I had squished it dead.  

Well, the kids started freaking out.  Emily started crying (she's and Lucas was definitely upset too).  I really didn't think I had stepped on it that hard (I was surprised at the results), and if it was only injured then I didn't want it to be suffering with internal bleeding and pain.  So I decided in all my brilliance to fetch a machete with the intent to chop off its head.  When the kids realized what I was doing, then started freaking out more.  Amanda came out of the house at that moment and convinced me not to continue with my plan of mercy.  So instead I simply scooped it up with a small shovel, placed it in a ziplok back, and threw it in the trash.  Needless to say, the kids were still upset in the car, but I apologized and explained that I didn't want to hear it anymore and that's just the way the world works sometimes.  It probably wasn't the best reasoning, but it surprisingly seemed to help.

LUCAS SOCCER GAME

I insisted on bringing our dog Hope to the game with us, and she did pretty good for the most part.  I kept her leash reigned in close, but I'm glad she got to get out of the house a bit.  The weather was great for Lucas' soccer game too, and the coach kept him in it for ~3/4 of the game.  He's definitely getting better.  Amanda's parents joined us there and also to Penn Station for lunch (yum!).

WRETCHED FAN PROJECT

I worked on Emily's ceiling fan project for the rest of the day, and found yet another unexpected obstacle in the wiring.   This project has been taking me months to complete, and now it will be at least another week or two.  Ugh.

AWESOME DATE NIGHT

That evening was awesome!  Our friends, the Tipton family, watched the kids so Amanda and I could go on a date.  We take turns returning the favor for them also.  We started our date with dinner at a restaurant that was part of a hotel.  We never would have chosen it, except for a gift certificate that we had for restaurant.com (I think).  We had to pick from their selection of restaurants, and this place sounded OK.  Well, it turned out to be way better than we expected.  The food (and glass of wine) was uniquely flavored, very tasty, and mostly healthy too.   The ambiance was ok (nothing exciting, but clean and pleasing), and the service was great also.  Overall we were very pleased.  We followed that up with dessert and tasty decaf coffee at Starbucks (pumpkin spice latte and salted caramel mocha).  Then lastly we went to play outdoor putt-putt at Fairfield Fun Center.  Finding an outdoor place was harder than you'd think here, presumably because no one would want to play outside during the winter season.  We were the last people on the course before they closed.  Between the good food, perfect weather, and deep and thoughtful conversations it was a perfect date night.

SUNDAY'S BEAUTIFUL WEATHER, FAMILY RUN
Sunday morning we attended church as usual.  Then after lunch I got to watch the Bengals stomp Tennessee (33 to 7), and Amanda went climbing with Clara at Lifetime Fitness.  Clara did much better than we expected, considering how little she is!  Before dinner, we went for a jog as a family, stopping halfway at a small pond in the adjacent neighborhood..  Well, Amanda and I jogged, the big kids rode their bikes, and Clara rode in the stroller.  But it was still good exercise and we took our lazy dog along too - she surprisingly ran for almost the entire way!

When we returned home from the run, Clara wanted to stay outside and enjoy the weather.  So I grabbed a baseball and a small kid-sized glove and we both played catch for a while.

ULTIMATE FRISBEE
Finally, after dinner I went to church to help out with the high school youth group (like most Sunday evenings).  Before the worship/talk/small groups though we played Ultimate Frisbee.  More outdoor exercise is just fine for me!

It was a fantastic and memorable weekend.

Bruises, Bumps, and Basketball

I played basketball during lunch today, for the 2nd time in 10 days.  I like to play a pretty physical game too - not dirty (throwing elbows or fouling excessively), but I'm just not afraid to battle for the rebound, attempt to block a shot, or stand in the way of a drive.  Unfortunately, my shot still needs a lot of work though.

The last time I played I jammed my left ring finger.  It wasn't disgustingly swollen, but didn't seem to be healing very quickly either.  I think it's because my wedding ring is on the finger, and it's irritating the swelling by constricting it.  I tried to take it off (I normally leave it on 24/7), but no matter what I tried - soap, hand lotion, my swollen knuckle was too big for it to slip over.  So on it stays.

Although my knuckle wasn't fully healed yet, I decided to play again today.  As expected, I smacked my swollen finger numerous times during the games (I played for 2 total).  In addition to that though, I backed into someone who was running and their knee nailed my calf, bruising it pretty good.  I also got smacked or elbowed in the outside lower corner of my right eye, creating a bruise there.  And finally, I stood in the path of a big guy who liked to power his way under the basket and took what I think was one of his elbows to my nose as a consequence, which cut it (slightly visible in the above picture).  It was bleeding a decent amount, which necessitated someone else to substitute in for me on the last play of the game (I was willing to play, but no one wanted my blood all over them or the court).  At least I got a "good defense" comment out of the guy whose drive I blocked though.

As the icing on the cake of injuries, a couple of weeks ago I dropped a weight bench on my right big toe at the gym.  So now I have a blackened toenail too.  But here's the thing - I don't mind any of it.  Not one bit.  As long as the injuries can heal without any permanent damage, I would rather live a life with bumps, bruises, and cuts if that's the necessary consequence for being active and physical, for playing sports with determined aggression, and for feeling fit and manly.

The "Ideal" Amount of Exercise

My co-worker Joe was recently talking about his high blood pressure.  I asked him whether he exercises, to which he jokingly replied "yeah, to and from my car".

He then mentioned that he read somewhere that walking 20 minutes a day is significantly beneficial for health, and that he has a friend who started doing this daily, and lost a significant amount of weight as a result.

I thought that it's interesting if doctors are recommending just 20 minutes a day of walking now.  Not too long ago I remember reading that 60 minutes a day of aerobic activity is ideal, then more recently reading a recommendation of 30 minutes a day.  For a while, I was utilizing the 15-minute workouts that Men's Health frequently posts on their website.  They also often promote a book called "Big Book of 15-Minute Workouts".  I'm guessing that doctors and trainers are realizing that the loftier the goal is, the less likely that people are going to be to meet it, especially lazy and obese Americans.

So what is the ideal and/or sufficient amount of exercise that we should strive to get then?  Is it 60, 30, or 15 minutes or aerobic?  What about strength/weights?  Or should you just walk for 20?  Obviously, more activity is better.  And a combination of strength & aerobic training is also ideal.  However, if you are having a hard time finding an exercise routine or it keeps stalling out, then instead of getting overwhelmed with high expectations and lofty goals, just start with the simple idea that the ideal amount of exercise to get is this: 

more than you are getting right now.  

That's it.  Just start with whatever you can possibly fit in to your schedule and make it happen.  Then do a little more.  Then perhaps a bit more.  But to start, just focus on doing more than you're currently doing.

Exercise vs. Entertainment

I recently went to Florida to be with my family for my brother's 30th birthday and also my oldest daughter's 6th birthday. After eating one helping of pizza (3 slices) at my daughter's birthday party, I complained to my brother in-law about wanting to go back for more, but choosing to be sensible/disciplined instead.  We both reminisced about "back in the day" when we could eat as much pizza as we wanted to, without any regret or negative repercussions.

I then commented that maybe if we were as consumed by exercising and body building as a friend of ours is (who is also close to our age), then we wouldn't have to be as concerned with restricting our consumption.  Daniel then said something about us having to sacrifice so many other important aspects of our lives (like family, dedication to God, etc).

A few minutes later he was telling me about several TV shows that he and my sister have been enjoying.  The Walking Dead was one of them (that I am now hooked on too).  But as we were talking about this, I connected our previous conversation to this one, and thought about us feeling like it's impossible to dedicate ourselves to exercise, primarily because it seemed like it would require so much sacrifice.  And now here we were talking about spending what sounded like at least an hour per night watching various TV shows.

I know, I know - we all want to just "relax" after a long day of work, or kids, or school, or whatever.  And we already have to get up too early for all of these things as well.  And it's so hard to wake up and exercise when you're tired, and/or it's cold out, and/or we stayed up too late (watching TV or surfing the web).  But with all of these (sometimes valid) excuses, I keep coming back to the idea that we really just can't resist feeding our addiction to entertainment.  It's a habit that we can't break any more than a long time smoker can stop sucking his own life away through the end of a paper roll.

What it really comes down to for most of us, with the exception of a very small percentage of people, is that the incentive to exercise is just not significant enough to get us up off of the couch or out of our desk chairs.  We just aren't motivated enough to sacrifice our entertainment.